On saying, "I love you"

Two of the best moments I've had as a mom has been when you and Lili individually said, "I love you" to me spontaneously for the first time. I don't know if you'll remember this when you grow up but for awhile now you and I have this inside thing where I'll ask you if you know how much I love you, and you'll respond, "Too much!" and I'll say, "noooooo, I love you SO much, there's no such thing as too much when it comes to how much mommy loves Sam".  And then you'll usually say, "ooh, SO much!". Its one of my favorite things about life thus far.


I hope you continue to rest assured that you have a mommy, daddy, and sisi that love you unconditionally, no matter what.  There is nothing on this planet that will ever change that.  You'll come to interpret that as many different things as you grow up, and hopefully you'll arrive at adulthood with a pretty stable and solid understanding of what that means and how there will be times that it is not the easiest thing in the world to show, no matter how easy it is to know.  There are times when you'll probably accuse me of not loving you because I'm not letting you do or have something that you want and that you feel will make you happy.  I'll have to enforce discipline or consequences which (I'll readily admit at face-value especially as you are growing up) look like the farthest thing from love to you.  There will most certainly be times when you'll be right about something and I'm wrong and make the wrong decision about letting you do A, B, or C, but I will always do what I feel is the best for you, because I love you.  Sometimes what's ultimately best for you isn't easy, it'll piss you off, make you decide to not talk to me, and make me really sad to have to stand my ground for.  But when I'm faced with such a decision, no matter how tough it is to look out for what's best for you, I will always base my choice in the fact that I love you more than you will ever know.


I could go on and on about this topic, but I'll keep it brief.  Because, of course, I love you SO much baby boy.